I Get What I Want
by Mark of CTown
Summary: Slight AU. Takes place during novel. Jack always gets what he wants, from becoming Chief, the murder of Piggy, and total domination of the boys on the island. But when it comes to matters of the heart, does Jack always get what he wants? JackxRalph.
1. So Lonely Inside

**Chapter One - So Lonely Inside**

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What was he doing here?

This was the last place he should be - walking in the middle of the jungle. He didn't know if he was near Castle Rock or if he was near the old shelters. He'd been walking so long he could have been going in circles and wouldn't have even noticed. All he knew was that it was dark, and he probably shouldn't have been there.

The creepers ripped at his ankles. He felt them scratch, felt them tearing through his skin, but walked anyway. It reminded him that this was real. The entire island was real. Blood still flowed through his veins. This wasn't any nightmare, and he was fortunate enough to be alive.

Fortunate? Was he really all that fortunate?

He was alone. Piggy and Simon were dead; the two people who had been there since the very beginning. He had blown off the heavier boy half the time, not paid attention to what he said and not standing up for him when the others poked fun. He had never even cared enough to ask him his real name. And Simon. Poor Simon. He was so innocent; his hair falling in his eyes, his gentle voice that dripped with sincerity. Neither of them deserved death.

But it was exactly what they got.

Now he was left. One of the few things still surviving from the first established society on the island. How had everything happened? How had it reached the point where two boys had ended up dead, their bodies drifting at the bottom of the ocean, and he was running for his life from a pack of savages he had once called friends?

He tried to remember the beginning, but his memories were hazy. He remembered the plane, the boys. An election? Oh, he was the leader. A shell...was that the conch? Finding it in the lagoon. With Piggy. Piggy, whose body was crushed. Whose blood stained the sand surrounding Castle Rock. Exploring. Who was he exploring with? Simon. Simon and some one else. Hard as he tried, he couldn't remember who it was. His mind wouldn't let him recall the face. He saw himself smiling. Smiling at who? Who was he talking to? But all he saw was a blur. Maybe his mind couldn't remember times when he felt happy.

But times when everyone was happy had quickly disappeared.

He remembered fighting. Separating. Two tribes. One beast. The littluns. They had seen a beast. A snake-thing. The hunters. Fire. So much fire. Killing the beast. But it wasn't the beast. It was Simon. Poor, innocent Simon. Bleeding. Bleeding Red. Lots of red. Red of fire...of blood...of hair?

That's when who he had been trying to forget drifted back into his mind.

Jack. Jack Merridew. Head choir boy. He could sing C sharp. He wanted to be leader. He had red hair. He wanted to hunt. And to kill. But there was a time, before all of it. They had been friends. They had smiled at each other. Talked.

He sighed.

He felt the loneliness rip through his heart. He was alone now. So long ago it seemed were the days of swimming, playing in the sun, talking to Simon and Piggy...and to Jack. Now he was alone. Running for his life, running from the people that had been overcome with the want to kill and to block out the rules they had learned since they were young. Rules that had told them killing was wrong, that the way they were living was "savagery". But that was months ago...maybe a different lifetime.

He jumped as he heard something crack.

The boy stopped, looking around, wondering if it was his own foot crushing a twig that had created the sound, or some one else's. Something else's. Ralph had never believed in the beast, had never really listened when the littluns had complained about it. He stayed still and saw no sign of movement from what he could see between the brush. He continued walking, not wishing to return to the thoughts of moments before. But what else was there to think about? What else was there to occupy his mind?

"Hello, Ralph."

The fair haired boy jerked his head up, startled at the voice that had said his name. He stopped at who stood before him. His shoulder against the tree, his tall, slim body bathed in moonlight. His red hair hung around his head, and his face was covered with dirt and blood and paint. A smile was on his face, one that Ralph couldn't describe. But he was unsure if their was any kindness left in the boy's body for it to be a greeting.

"Jack."

He was too surprised to think of anything else to say.

The trees cast shadows on their bodies, and made it hard for Ralph to read all of Jack's expression. One eye seemed to glow, the other was covered in darkness. His spear was in his hand, but just as Ralph's body tensed Jack let it drop from his fist. It hit the ground and Jack crossed his arms. His smile widened.

"Shouldn't you be hiding?" Jack asked.

"From what?" He didn't believe in the beast.

Jack laughed. He remembered that laugh. Hearing it from beneath his body as he, Simon, and the red head explored the island on the first day and they had piled on each other in celebration. With a flick of his head Jack threw back the hair that was falling into his eyes.

"My tribe. They're ready. You should be afraid."

Ralph thought for a second. He should be afraid, shouldn't he? But something inside of him was thinking of the old Jack, the one that wouldn't hurt him.

"There's a lot more than I could be afraid of then a bunch of boys running around with sticks."

Something flashed in Jack's eyes."Not really, Ralph. What else is there on this island? Every turn you make could lead to death. You could drown. You could be killed by the beast. But my tribe means torture."

Ralph shuddered. Jack saw it and smiled again - the sign of weakness captivated him and made his eyes glow in a way that Ralph had never been comfortable with...

"What? Do you think that we would just kill you? Shove a spear through your heart, a moment of pain, and let you die? No, we would keep you. Show you how a real leader runs his tribe."

"A real leader? One that only hunts and kills? No rules, no obedience. You just run around, spilling blood and dancing and feasting."

Jack shrugged. "We want to have fun here. We're stuck on this island, Ralph. There's not much hope of getting off. When was the last time you really thought we were going to get rescued? Not for awhile. Why have rules? There's no one here to tell us what to do. Well, " Jack seemed to perk up at this, "we had you. See how that turned out. They have me now. And they're happy."

"They're insane," Ralph replied, remembering the look on some of the older boy's faces. How their eyes looked dead, how much they had changed.

"Who cares? They listen to me. I'm their chief. That's all I want. That's all I've ever wanted. And that's what I got. They jump at my every order. They'd probably walk around backwards if I told them to."

"That's all you've ever wanted? Power and control over a group of mindless children? You're pathetic, Jack."

"Hey! Don't talk to me that way!" Jack's face turned from a smile to fury faster than Ralph would have guessed. He almost jumped at the transition and regretted what he said at once, glancing at the spear that lay on the ground by Jack's feet. But the red head didn't reach for it, only tightened his fists and screamed.

"You could be dead by now, Ralph! You should be dead by now! They've wanted to find you for days, but I didn't tell them to, so they've stayed in Castle Rock. They do what I tell them! And if I went back and told them it was time, they'd have no problem killing you now!"

"Why haven't you?" Ralph asked, feeling his fear quickly depart from him.

The taller frowned. "Why haven't I what?"

Ralph laughed. "Attacked. Tried to find me. You know there's no one else on this island beside's me. Why wait? Why not come and kidnap me? It's your entire tribe against me. I can't be hard to find." He loved the power this was giving him - an adrenaline rush he used to feel when the littluns had relied on him before the separation. "Hey, you found me. And I didn't even notice until you said something. I could be dead right now. You could've killed me."

Jack looked down, startled, and felt his hair fall back over his eyes. He had slipped and Ralph had caught him, and he mentally cursed himself. When he didn't answer, Ralph only smiled wider.

"You have your spear right there, Jack. Just pick it up and run me through with it. You're taller. You're stronger. I'm weak, I haven't eaten in days. I couldn't put up much of a fight. Why don't you kill me?"

Jack bent down, picking up his spear. He twirled it in his fingers, thinking for a few seconds. Then he looked up and smiled.

"It's like I told you, Ralph. I get what I want." And with that, Jack Merridew turned and disappeared back into the darkness.

-

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**A.N.: Hey! Wow, I can't believe this is finally posted. I've been writing it for over a year and, I promise, my writing has gotten a lot better since I wrote this first chapter, but I'm not going back and changing it now. This is not a one shot; there will definitely be more chapters. I really hope you enjoyed it. The Lord of the Flies section on FF needs to make a comeback!**

**Please read and review! Love and hugs if you do! **


	2. I Never Sleep

**Chapter Two - I Never Sleep**

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"Where did you go?" Roger asked.

Jack jumped. He hadn't noticed the boy's presence. As loyal as Roger had always been, he had always been weary of the other boy. He was so quiet, spending his time sneaking around or watching everyone with a monochromatic expression on his face. No one ever knew what he could be thinking. Or where he could be hiding, apparently.

He had just returned to Castle Rock and was so absorbed in his own mind that he probably wouldn't have noticed if his entire tribe had been blocking the entrance. Jack's spear was hanging loosely from his hand as he had been dragging it along the ground. He'd spent the walk back thinking about Ralph. For better or for worse, it seemed like the fair-haired boy was on his mind a lot lately.

"What?" Jack asked.

"Where did you go?" Roger asked him again. "I've been on watch half the night. I saw you leave. That was some time ago. Where have you been?"

Jack avoided the question for a moment. He wondered if it was worth it to lie to Roger, the one who was always loyal. The one who had come over to his tribe not for food or because it was more powerful, but because he had wanted to for Jack. But he was chief, he had control, and saying what he had really been doing was his decision.

"I was looking...for Ralph."

Roger's eyes tripled in size. "You were looking for Ralph? Why would you do that?"

"It's night. Of course, he must be sleeping. What would make him think that we would be searching for him so late? I thought that, maybe, I could find him. I brought my spear...in case I did. During the day he's probably always on the run from us. But if I could catch him while he was unsuspecting..." Jack trailed off, fearing he was being repetitive and that Roger would see through him. His explanations were never that long, and Roger wasn't as stupid as most people took him to be.

The smaller smiled, leaning back against the walls of Castle Rock.

"Of course, Chief. You are completely right. I agree with your thinking. Any luck?"

Jack shook his head. "No. I searched in every bush I passed. I saw no sign of him."

"Of course, he is still out there."

"Oh, no doubt. Hidden better than I would have guessed." Roger tried to interject a comment but he was quickly cut off as Jack swept by him. He was in no mood to discuss Ralph with anyone.

He passed by the boys, all of them lying near each other. Their blood stained chests rose and fell, and Jack walked silently through the maze before stopping. He always slept farther from the boys as a way to represent his superiority. But he wouldn't chance the boys finding out that he didn't sleep anymore.

He lay down, his body used to the feeling of hard rock beneath his skin. They had all grown accustomed to it and had tried to make it better, but Jack didn't bother with making mattresses of grass and leaves. He knew he wouldn't be sleeping, but instead delighted in the boys' words of awe that he was able to fall asleep with the jagged points piercing his skin. It was like a bed of nails, but he didn't mind.

_"I was looking...for Ralph."_

Jack could have been happy that he hadn't really lied to Roger. He had been looking for Ralph. He had, or so he thought, snuck out unnoticed when Samneric were switching positions with a then unknown boy to spend the night making sure their fortress was safe. He had searched in every bush he passed, hoping to hear the sound of a boy breathing or see a glimpse of fair hair falling over a golden face.

But the reasons he was looking for him and the reasons he had told Roger were quite different.

He remembered walking between the creepers and seeing blood, wondering if it was left from a pig hunt of if it was Ralph's, his ankles getting cut as he walked through the forest. He listened hard, hoping that he would maybe hear the other humming or stepping on a twig, hoping that a crack would echo through the forest. He had all but given up hope when he saw something moving among the trees.

And then Jack heard a sigh.

He immediately stopped moving as he watched the fair-haired boy, his head down as he lazily picked his way through the dirt. He didn't look happy and he didn't look worried. Ralph seemed to not even be thinking that it was possible the tribe would be looking for him this late.

Jack inched forward, trying to get a closer look at the other boy. That's when his foot stepped on a fallen twig and Ralph stopped. Jack bent low to the ground, the way he did when he was hunting until he was almost crawling on all fours and stole forward, using the moment to its advantage. A plan was forming in his mind, quickly formulating as he distanced himself several feet from Ralph.

He watched as the boy stopped looking around and continued forward.

Talking a deep breath, Jack stepped around the tree and leaned his shoulder against it. He watched the other, his head returning to its downcast position, before making his presence known.

(He was so _beautiful._)

"Hello, Ralph," he said.

The entire time he was fighting his desire to break out laughing. He watched Ralph squirmer under his questions - something that delighted him to where he didn't even try hiding his smile. He thought he was stronger, that he was in control of where the conversation was going. But he didn't realize how comfortable he had grown until his anger had gotten the better of him.

_"Why haven't you?" _

_He frowned. "Why haven't I what?" _

_Ralph laughed. "Attacked. Tried to find me. You know there's no one else on this island besides me. Why wait? Why not come and kidnap me? It's your entire tribe against me. I can't be hard to find."_

Why hadn't he?

He knew the answer. He knew why he hadn't tried to find Ralph. He knew why he hadn't told his tribe it was time. What happened if they found him first? Who knew if they would listen to him? What if they forgot and ran him through with their spears and Jack was left starring at his lifeless body as blood poured from open wounds? What point was there of being alive on the island if the one reason he had ever desired power in the first place was dead?

Was he about to tell Ralph all this?

Definitely not.

But before he could speak, Ralph continued to taunt him.

_"You have your spear right there, Jack. Just pick it up and run me through with it. You're taller. You're stronger. I'm weak, I haven't eaten in days. I couldn't put up much a fight. Why don't you kill me?"_

Jack glanced down at his spear. He could. He could pick it up right now. But didn't he just say he always got what he wanted? And he didn't want Ralph dead. That, he knew.

He hadn't answered any of Ralph's questions for some time. He hated feeling the shift of power, it was not something he was accustomed to. But he had to say something. Jack bent down, picking up his spear and twirling it in his hands.

_"It's like I told you, Ralph. I get what I want." _

He had walked away, wishing he could run through the forest back to Castle Rock. Jack wanted so desperately to have seen the look on his face and to know what the other was thinking. He wondered where Ralph was now and hoped he had fallen asleep.

The sky was dotted with stars, but the comfort the night time had once brought him was no longer there. How long could they be stuck on this island? Jack felt so cold, so alone. He turned his head, watching the other boys. He looked at their faces, but he couldn't see them, could he? He saw clay and blood, staining the innocence of boys who, until weeks ago, knew nothing of war and murder.

Jack shut his eyes. But he knew that sleep did not await him.

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**A.N.: Yes, I know, this was an extremely boring chapter and nothing really happened. I just needed to buy some time before big things start...**

**Anyway, I just want to quickly thank a few people. hosegirl08, Tobi-Uchiha, and XbuttonsX for leaving reviews, thank you so much! I can't tell you how much it means to me that people actually like this. ferretstheslave, thanks for the favorite! I can't even believe it! And finally, LoopyTheFoxz, XbuttonsX, and horsegirl08 for alerting! Really, I can't tell you how much any of that means to me. **

**Love and hugs! Hope you enjoyed it! **


	3. Infatuation Turning Into Disease

**Chapter Three - Infatuation Turning Into Disease**

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Ralph opened his eyes and shut them again. Light. The light hurt so much. He pushed himself up until he was kneeling, his hands on his knees as he fought to keep his eyes open while they adjusted to how bright it was. He rubbed them; they were stinging from the dirt that had blanketed his fingers during the few hours of rest he had gotten. Ralph was still so tired, but he knew he couldn't sleep, just in case anyone came looking for him and found him hidden away in the brush. Just in case he went to sleep and they didn't allow him to wake up again.

He ran his hand through his hair, hoping to remove the mess of twigs and leaves that had entangled in it during the night. After his encounter with Jack, he had spent the next few hours trying to sort everything out, trying to get everything to make sense. Jack had found him but hadn't killed him, even dropping his spear to prove to Ralph he had no intentions of hurting him. It didn't make sense.

He stood up, his legs shaking slightly and looked at where he had just been sleeping. It would be another place tonight, just in case Jack had followed him through the forest, seen where he had laid to rest, and was planning on taking him by surprise with a few other tribe members by his side.

Ralph walked slowly and cautiously through the trees, something he had quickly and easily grown accustomed to, making his way to the lagoon so that he could get something to drink. The water tasted so pure and it ran so smoothly down his throat, it was so different from heat of the island. He heard his stomach begging for food and he grimaced at the thought of eating fruit and getting sick. If only he had meat...

But he _could_ have meat.

He could give up, go and join Jack's tribe, become one of the mindless hunters that followed the head choir boy around like he was some type of god. He could hear Jack calling the other hunters to him so that they could laugh at him, laugh that he had finally given up after days of lurking scared through the forest. Then Jack would probably sit on his throne (if Jack had a throne and he was sure that he did) and make Ralph kiss his feet to show that he had given up all power. Then they would probably just kill him anyway. Jack would get exactly what he wanted.

But then, Ralph really didn't know _what_ Jack wanted. The day before he had thought the red haired boy wanted him dead.

Ralph plucked some fruit off the tree and turned it over in his hands. Almost everything was rotten, and the sour juice in his mouth made him nauseous.

Yes, he would do anything for meat. And if it wasn't for the memory of Simon and Piggy, he would do anything to get it.

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Jack leaned his back against the rocks, watching as the tide rolled in and retreated back. The water was so blue; it almost blended in with the sky so that he couldn't tell where one ended and where the other began. He picked up the survival knife, something that he as chief always carried in his possession, and began to carve the block of wood he had found. He didn't know what he was making, but he didn't know what else he should be doing. It would only be a matter of minutes before some one found him and begged him to go out on another hunt and he would lead the screaming group through the forest. Jack didn't want to go hunting.

Jack wanted to be alone. Jack wanted the comforts of sleep. Jack wanted to be off this damned, forsaken island.

That's why he sat in the same spot every day, staring off into the horizon, hoping to one day see a boat or a ship or _something_, anything to give him proof that there was life beyond the island, outside of a bunch of boys running around in war paint.

But he was one of those boys.

Even worse, he had created them.

He had been the first to paint his face and had made the others follow in his footsteps. He had gotten everything he had wanted. He was chief now, he had control over everything on the island.

Except Ralph.

Everything, the entire island, it all felt like a dream to him. He could barely remember school, his family, the choir boys before they had become his followers. He wondered if this was how he would spend every day of his life until he died. In a day. In a week. In a month. Or maybe he would spend years slipping into insanity before he could finally sleep again.

Jack, who had stopped paying attention to what his hands were doing, saw it before he felt it. He dropped the knife and stared at the blood running down his palm, sliding over his wrist, staining the sand. He didn't try to stop it, but just waited.

That's when he felt his finger start throbbing and smiled. He could still feel pain.

_"I guess I'm still alive."_

"Chief!" Jack looked over as Roger walked towards him. His black hair was a mess and had grown down almost to his shoulders. Jack tried to recall what Roger looked like before they had been on the island, but all he could gather were those same cold eyes and a choir boy uniform.

"What are you doing?" Roger looked down at the blood on the ground. "Was it the beast?"

Jack laughed. He knew damn well Roger never believed in the beast, and Roger knew Jack didn't believe in it either. "What do you want, Roger?"

"The others want to go on a hunt. They want more meat."

Jack smiled, looking back out at the water once more, hoping that there was something there. But when all that greeted him was blue fading into blue, he stood up and faced Roger. Using his other hand, he dipped a finger in his blood and drew a slanted line across one of Roger's cheeks.

"Chief?" Roger asked. Jack stopped and looked away.

"Let's go."

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Ralph always ended up here, in the shadows of all he had created. The three huts still stood somehow, after all the storms that they had faced since they had first come to the island. He could still remember how hard they were to build, how he and Simon had built each one together with Piggy talking of how he couldn't help because of his ass-mar. He remembered how many days they had spent lying inside them, talking about if they really believed in the beast, how angry he was that the littluns...and the biguns...never listened to anything he had to say. They had sheltered them through all the rain and all their fears, as if a pathetic shelter of branches and leaves was their only true protection from the reality of death and hunger and never seeing home again.

Ralph could still remember all those days in his head, walking with Jack on the beach, swimming together in the lagoon. Back before the other had drifted from him, formed his own tribe and killed Ralph's two closest friends. Jack had been one of his closest friends then, too. He didn't know what they were now. Not friends. Enemies? Rivals? But Ralph had stopped fighting so long ago.

An overwhelming sense of loneliness washed over him, gripping at his heart as the fact he was alone was being screamed at him again.

The platform was not too far off. Ralph remembered when he had been chief, when all the boys had gathered around him and listened to everything he had to say. Before they had all gone insane, painting their faces and yelling war chants that he didn't see how would help get them off the island. Ralph laid back in the sand, stretching his back and sighing to himself. He was tired of walking, he was tired of being on the island, he was tired of everything.

Maybe the hunters killing him wouldn't be so bad after all.

At least then he could sleep.

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_"Kill the pig! Slit her throat! Bash her in!"  
"Kill the pig! Slit her throat! Bash her in!"  
"Kill the pig! Slit her throat! Bash her in!"_

Jack smiled as he sat on his "throne" - something the littluns had constructed out of rocks for him as a gift to their chief, as the boys dropped their kill in front of him. It was almost nightfall; Jack could see the sun sinking down behind the trees. They had been out for hours...or what Jack would consider hours. Time barely existed since they landed on the island, just the memory of time when they had clocks and watches and their lives were ruled by a bell. Countless spears fell to the ground and some boys collapsed where they were. A group stood ready with the fire already burning. Others gathered around, whispering and smiling at the prospect of eating after a long day of hunting. They were tired and they were hungry.

"Will you do the honors?" Roger asked. Jack was jerked from his thoughts of night time and its pending meaning for him and looked at Roger. He already had the survival knife in his hand, poised over the dead pig's throat.

Silently, Jack got up and took the knife from Roger's hand. He felt the blood running over his fingers as the head rolled away from the body. The littluns cheered, some yelling, "Another gift! We need to leave it another gift!" Jack got up and faced the water, which was shining in the retreating sun.

"Right. Leave it...for the beast." Jack heard movement behind him - spears running through the pig's body as it was lifted over the fire. He looked down at the blood on his hands and closed his fists so that it ran through his fingers. He remembered when this was what he had so truly desired, to slaughter and to have power.

But strangely, his mind...or it could be his heart, something he had prided himself in never admitting he had...told him he desired something else.

Some one else.

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**A.N.: I know it was another pointless chapter but I promise, Jack and Ralph meet at the very beginning of chapter four, so you guys don't have to wait much longer for good things to happen... =) Again, I wrote this all so long ago I barely remember what happens. I feel so bad for dragging it out this long.**

**Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed/favorited/alerted. Seriously, you have no idea how much it means to me. I just got done with midterms so I'm too tired to look up everyone's names, but just know that everything is greatly appreciated more than I can express at two in the morning. **

**And I have to give a huge, huge thank you to my lovely friend, Jane, who read most of this story over for me. **

**Love and hugs! Please read and review!**


	4. One Last Touch

**Chapter Four - One Last Touch & Then You'll Go  
**

**-**

Ralph stared up at the sky. There were so many stars shining above the island. It was something he had loved on the first night, seeing more stars than he had never seen in his life. But so many days...weeks...maybe even months...had passed. He would do anything to look up at the sky and only see a few stars.

That would mean he was _home. _

He slowly pushed himself up; he knew he couldn't stay in such an obvious place. Ralph was still lying on the beach and the shelters were still visible from where he was. His body ached and his stomach grumbled, but he stood as the waves crashed against the shore and he stumbled into the forest.

That's when the familiar thoughts that he should just give up and join Jack's tribe crept into his mind. He ran his fingers through his hair and longed for the days when it had been short and not so troublesome.

"Messing with it's not going to help. It's just going to make it look worse."

Ralph jumped, turning around to be greeted by Jack's wide smile. He tried to remain composed as he searched the surrounding areas for any sign of other hunters, for any sign of movement. Jack's smile only brightened.

"I'm alone, Ralph."

If he had thought telling Ralph that he was alone would reassure him, it didn't. He wasn't sure that he wanted to see Jack alone. Only the day before, he would have considered himself lucky to run into the chief without any of his fellow savages. But with his questions concerning Jack's intentions, he didn't know exactly how he felt.

Ralph didn't answer. He breathed slowly, hoping his heartbeat would start to slow.

"Are you planning on talking to me?" Jack stepped closer. Ralph could tell that he wasn't holding his spear, but he didn't doubt that it was somewhere close by. The moonlight poured in on Jack's face. He had forgotten what he repeatedly told himself, to walk in the shadows so that he couldn't be found. But he had forgotten, again, and had been caught for the second time. There was something about the way the light shone on Jack that made Ralph think, before he could suppress the thought, that there was something...attractive...about Jack Merridew.

It didn't help to slow his heartbeat.

Ralph's mind started racing again. He knew he had been on the island too long if he was starting to think that a boy was good-looking.

"I have something for you, Ralph, and you're not going to get it if you don't talk to me." Jack lowered himself down and leaned his back against a tree. Ralph did the same, several feet away from the other.

"What do you have?" Ralph asked. He wondered if it was something he would even want. He couldn't think of anything on the island that Jack would have...or would give up...that Ralph couldn't find somewhere else.

Jack smiled. It flashed again in Ralph's mind. The days on the island when Jack had smiled at him so often. That long time ago when they had...liked...each other. Before he hated Jack.

Right?

"Here."

Ralph reacted just in time to catch the chunk of meat. He stared at it as the warmth spread through his hands. His stomach immediately begged for it, and he looked back at the red head.

"Eat it, Ralph. I promise, it's not poisoned. There's no place to get arsenic anywhere around here. And besides, I don't want you dead."

Ralph ignored the last sentence as he shoved the food into his mouth. It tasted so good, he didn't know how he had managed this long on only fruit and water. Jack watched him as he ate, something that Ralph seemed to not notice. He was too hungry to care about anything except food. It was only after he noticed that Jack was intently watching him, not even blinking and wearing the smile that always sent shivers up his spine, that Ralph slowed his pace.

"Why?" Ralph asked.

Jack didn't even move. "Why what?"

"Why did you bring me food?"

Jack didn't answer. He smirked, the edge of his mouth tilting upwards, but he didn't speak.

"We're enemies, Jack. Don't you know that? You deserted my tribe, formed your own, stole Piggy's specs, took the survival knife, killed my only two friends, and left me out here to spend my life running away from you and your group of savages. You found me, now you're supposed to kill me. You're not supposed to be giving me food."

"I'm not even supposed to be here, Ralph. None of my tribe knows I left. It's night time, they're all sleeping. You can add that to your list of everything I've done since we've gotten here."

"But that's what I'm asking you. What are you doing here?" Jack was beginning to frustrate him. Why couldn't he ever just answer him? He didn't have the energy to try to figure out his inclinations.

Jack looked around. There were endless trees blending into the darkness, creepers that covered most of the forest except where they were sitting. There was moonlight breaking through the canopy of leaves and caressing spots of the ground with it's glow. Ralph took the moment of silence to eat more, in which Jack went back to watching him.

He knew why he was here. He was here for the boy sitting in front of him. Jack was risking complete rejection, both from his tribe that would probably kill him if they knew he was sneaking off during the night to meet Ralph and from Ralph himself, who obviously didn't feel the way that Jack felt about him. He had a good reason for being there, but the reason he had wasn't one he was going to tell Ralph.

How was he supposed to say that he loved him? Wanted him? Wanted to touch him? Kiss him? Wanted his tribe to reject him so that he could spend his days with Ralph, the way they had in the beginning, before he had been consumed by the desire for power and blood and to impress that led him to ultimately surpass Ralph's rule and turn completely mad?

By this time Ralph was done eating and was staring back at the red haired boy. He faltered immediately under his intense gaze, but he was frustrated and forced himself to look back at Jack.

"Do you hate me, Ralph?"

That was not what he had expected.

"What?"

"You heard what I said. You told me that we were enemies. Is that how you think of me? As an enemy? Do you hate me?" Jack asked. Ralph's only returning thought was that the other was completely insane, which was nothing new.

"What type of question is that?"

"It's a simple question, Ralph," Jack said. "Yes or no. Do you hate me?"

Ralph continued to stare at the Chief. What was he supposed to say? Yes? Get himself killed? Was he supposed to say that he didn't hate Jack? That he didn't hate him for killing Simon or Piggy or turning all their friends against him? But Ralph knew the answer without thinking; he knew he didn't hate Jack. Somehow, for some reason beyond his own comprehension, he didn't hate him.

"What if I said I did? That I hated you. Would you kill me?" Ralph asked.

Jack looked away from the fair haired boy for a moment to briefly stare at the ground before regaining eye contact.

_"No, you'd kill me."_

"Just answer the question, Ralph."

Ralph thought for a moment. He didn't see why Jack would care if he said he didn't hate him. He didn't think that would make the eventual torture any more merciful. Ralph couldn't remember the last time he thought that Jack had a nice bone in his body. But he had brought him meat, hadn't he? Didn't that mean something?

"No."

Jack's eyes widened.

"What?"

Ralph looked down, then up again. "No, Jack, I don't hate you."

Jack couldn't even comprehend what Ralph had just said. He'd expected the other to say that he hated him, that he didn't even know why he was sitting near him other than that he had brought food. He'd expected getting screamed at, sitting there as he took the blows of Ralph's words, the other not knowing how horribly everything cut through him. He'd expected to listen to more talk about he caused Simon and Piggy's death and how it was his fault that everyone was separated in the first place. "No, Jack, I don't hate you" was not what he expected at all.

"But that doesn't mean I like you very much, either."

And there was the spear getting driven through his heart.

Not that he had expected any different. Not that he really thought Ralph honestly did like him. What was he thinking, to even ask such a question? He'd known what he'd been thinking. In the depths of his heart, he wanted a confession of love and desire. But the idea that Ralph didn't hate him was good enough.

"Why not? Why don't you hate me?"

Ralph leaned his head back. He didn't know what he was still doing talking to Jack. He had finished eating but was still hungry. He picked up a stick and drew shapes in the dirt, his mind starting to drift again.

"I remember...those days...back, when we first got on the island...when we were...friends?...or at least we tolerated each other." Jack watched as Ralph talked, taking in the lazy movements of his arm and his hair falling into his face. Something was stirring inside him, something he was finding so hard to control. "No, we were friends then. I know we were. And I liked you, Jack. I really did. But then...you just became obsessed with blood and you killed and now I'm alone. But I don't have much to do during the day. So I just think...I remember that time. And I can't hate you for what we were then." Ralph stopped and threw the twig over his shoulder.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this, Jack. I don't think you even remember what things used to be like. And if I wasn't so damn lonely now, I wouldn't even be talking to you."

Ralph looked up at Jack. The red haired boy had since turned his head and was looking off between the trees. He wondered if anything he had said had hurt him, had reached him, or if Jack even really cared.

If he knew anything, it was that Jack Merridew was the most frustrating person he had ever met.

"What are you thinking?" Ralph asked.

It was a few moments before Jack turned his head back to look at Ralph. The intensity in his gaze sent shivers down his spine. He couldn't even remember the last time anyone had looked at him that way.

Jack inched forward, almost crawling, towards Ralph. The fair haired boy simply stared, reminded of all the times he had seen the other hunting, the look on his face like one of death but with something else mixed in...something not familiar to him.

Jack stopped only inches away from where Ralph had pressed himself against the tree. He didn't know what Jack was doing and if he should jump up and run away screaming.

"You're beautiful," Jack said.

"What?" Ralph practically screamed. His eyes were fixated on Jack, and he didn't even notice Jack lifting his hand up and running his finger down the side of his face.

"You're beautiful," Jack repeated, like it was completely obvious. "Really. I mean, just look at you. Your eyes, your hair, everything. You're just wonderful to look at. I've always enjoyed looking at you. I _can_ remember first seeing you on the island. You were always better looking than everyone else. And I always liked you."

Ralph felt his jaw drop open. Had Jack gone insane? It was only a couple of minutes ago that he thought the other's exterior was just a ploy to keep control, that he really hadn't gone completely mad in the time they had been on the island. But telling him he was beautiful? It screamed insane.

That's when Ralph felt shivers down his spine as Jack's hand ran back up his check. He hadn't even realized it was there, but was still too shocked to move and push it away. Too shocked that the other was touching him that way, and too shocked that he liked it.

He wondered if it was just his mind that made it look like Jack's face was moving closer and closer, until he could see where the paint had chipped on his face and see his reflection in Jack's eyes.

"What.." Ralph started weakly, but his sentence trailed off as Jack's mouth found his.

Jack knew he couldn't prevent it any longer. He was so close; Ralph's face was inches from his own. Something was spreading through his body, something that made him feel like he was going to shake uncontrollably if he tried to remain still. He leaned forward and caught Ralph's mouth with his own. Maybe everything around him, maybe the island, maybe the insanity, maybe all the other boys didn't exist, but this did. He could feel it, feel Ralph's mouth underneath his, as unresponsive as it was. But it didn't matter; this was something he'd wanted and needed for so long. He felt the fire spreading through his veins as his hand moved to the back of Ralph's neck. And even though inside of him he wished that it could have gone on forever, he pulled away and looked at Ralph. The fair haired boy's jaw dropped open and Jack smiled. He ran his fingertips over Ralph's cheek one last time before standing up and disappearing through the creepers.

----------

-

**A.N.: I'm sorry it took so long for this chapter! School and life have been completely insane lately. Amazing, you know, but still kinda insane. I hope you enjoyed it though. They officially kissed! And trust me, there's plenty more of that to come...**

**Anyway, I'm soory I was too tired to do this last chapter - many thanks and a thousand hugs to Jammeke, LoopyTheFoxz, MsMeow, Tobi-Uchiha, XbuttonsX, and horsegirl08 for alerting. Even more thanks and more hugs (if that's possible) to SupremeWonderFishTaco, XbuttonsX, Jammeke, Crock-fever, and Tobi-Uchiha for your reviews and continued support. Really, I know I've said this at the end of every chapter, but I can't tell you how much any support/review/favorite/alert means to me. Really, it's mind blowing. I can't even explain it.**

**Please review! Love and hugs if you do (obviously)!**


	5. You're All I'm Wanting

**Chapter Five - You're All I'm Wanting**

-

Despite another sleepless night, only to be "awakened" by the littluns' screams the next morning, Jack couldn't hide that he was smiling.

He could feel the clay on his cheeks cracking - smiling was something he hadn't been doing much of recently, but there was no stopping it no matter how hard he tried. Jack did everything he could think of to distract himself, but the night before was replaying in his head and he couldn't block it out.

Not that he wanted to.

Jack sat among the others for as long as he felt he had to. He watched the littluns as they raced towards the water. He was their chief and he didn't even know their names, but everyday he watched them as jealousy encompassed him. They were running, chanting - (dammit, _they looked so happy_) - and he always wished he could feel as happy as they looked. But finally, this morning, he did. The image of Ralph drifted back into his head, and he looked around for anything else to distract himself with.

The biguns were lying in a group, sharpening more spears. Roger was staring at him from under the strands of black hair that would have broken dress code at the academy. Their eyes connected and Jack looked away; he could feel shivers spreading down his spine. He knew he wasn't scared of Roger, but that one second when their eyes connected he had no idea what the boy had been thinking. Things that Jack couldn't control were what frightened him the most, and he knew he couldn't control Roger - he'd found that out already.

Jack turned his head back to the littluns. They never went in the water any higher than their chins, for Jack had told them their face paint could never be washed off. Jack didn't want to see their clean, tanned faces for fear he would remember what life on the island in the beginning had been like. He hadn't even thought about it until Ralph had brought it up the night before.

_Ralph._

Jack allowed himself to be pulled away to his secluded spot by the ocean. He lied down in the sand and closed his eyes. It was like the nighttime was there again and suddenly he could see Ralph's face only inches from his own. It was everything he'd wanted and had been waiting for for months, and he knew that if he leaned in just a little closer... Jack could practically hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears as he replayed the scene over and over - it felt so unreal compared to everything that had happened in the last few months. The sweet reality of kissing Ralph couldn't compare to his thinking about it while he lay awake at night. He hadn't even got the opportunity to hold him, to really touch him, to _really _kiss him...

Jack opened his eyes, his blood pulsing through his veins and his hands starting to shake. He was restless - he felt like he would implode if he didn't move. He wished that Ralph was there; there was a tugging at his heart that was interfering with his breathing. Jack couldn't miss Ralph - not this much, not this soon. What if they got even...closer...how would he survive without him then? Jack sat up suddenly, his eyes going wide as everything inside of him shattered.

What if they didn't get closer?

Jack hadn't even considered, for the hours he had been thinking about him, that if he saw Ralph again he would reject him. He ran his hands through his hair and dropped his arms loosely to his sides. He'd been too enthralled with actually kissing him that he hadn't thought maybe the fair haired boy wouldn't want to do it again. Ralph hadn't even responded to the kiss or gave him anything except a wide eyed stare in return.

_"But he didn't push you away."_

Jack looked back out at the ocean, but it just made him feel alone.

----------

Ralph rolled away from the brush as he felt sunlight break through the leaves. He cursed; his back was killing him from sleeping on dirt for what felt like forever. Except that night he couldn't sleep, but he had instead spent hours tossing and turning, tormented by thoughts that wouldn't leave him.

He stood up and began walking, even though he felt like he didn't need to. Something told him that running from Jack and his tribe wasn't necessary anymore, because Jack and his tribe weren't going to be coming after him. After last night, he was starting to believe that Jack didn't want him dead.

Ralph's stomach was in knots, but he knew eating wouldn't help him. All he could think about was Jack, and what had happened.

Jack had _kissed_ him.

His enemy - friend - whatever he classified him as, had kissed him. Not only was he a boy, but he was a murderer. The words seared themselves into Ralph's brain and made him feel nauseous. He didn't know how it had happened - the entire night just seemed like a blur that he didn't have energy to sort out. Had he missed something, something that could have warned him of what Jack was going to do? But all he remembered was Jack's completely random questions, the way he had looked at him, Jack telling him he was beautiful, the way their lips had touched...

Ralph buried his face in his hands. He liked the kiss. He knew it, and he knew it even if he didn't want to admit it. He had liked Jack in the beginning, had told him so the night before, but had left out that he missed feeling close to him. As upset as he was at their deaths, Simon and Piggy had never been able to fill Jack's place once his desire for power started growing. Simon had spent too much time appearing and disappearing that, despite having wisdom that surpassed his years, had never made him feel like Simon was really there. Piggy had been nothing more than one last person with the same amount of sanity that Ralph possessed, and his death had just meant that he was alone. He'd always hoped that Jack would one day give up and rejoin the old tribe, but that wish had drifted as more boys transferred to be under the red head's control.

Ralph was hot; the air felt like it was suffocating him. He didn't know where exactly he was going, but he hoped it led to the ocean.

----------

"He did it!" Percival heaved as he pointed his small finger at the other littlun.

Jack frowned, he was angry - this was exactly what he didn't want. Percival was always annoying to him, spending most of his time moping around because he'd forgotten what street he lived on, and Jack didn't feel like dealing with him now. But it wasn't Percival that was frustrating him, it was the other littlun, the one who had disobeyed the Chief.

"He threw water at me! He got me wet! Look what he did! He ruined my mask!"

"I did not! You got in my way!"

"No! You're lying! You just don't want to get punished!"

Jack clenched his fists as other littluns joined in the fighting, each taking a different side. The biguns were standing in the background, but they weren't laughing like they normally did whenever the younger children got into pointless fights over rocks or beds or stupid games they'd made up to pass the time. This was serious. This was different. Everyone, when they became a member of Jack's tribe, got their face painted and was told that it could not be washed off. If they did wash off the face paint they were to be "banished" from the tribe because of disloyalty.

"Stop it! Shut up! All of you! Now!" There was silence immediately as everyone looked at him.

Percival wiped away his tears, but all it did was remove even more of the clay on his face. It was almost bare; the way Jack remembered it when Percival had told Ralph his address.

_Assemblies. Ralph. Clean faces. Order. Ralph. The conch. The platform. Ralph. A small, mouse - colored boy. "Percival Wemys Madison of the Vicarage, Harcourt St. Anthony..."_

"Get more clay!" Jack yelled, his eyes shut and his nails starting to tear the skin of his palms. He opened his eyes but no one had moved except Percival, who was whimpering from behind his fingers.

"Now!"

Bill and Maurice immediately ran. Jack turned back to Percival but looked over his head, at where the sun was sinking behind the ocean and the sky was slowly turning black.

"Who was it?"

"Johnny..." Percival managed to whisper. Other littluns nodded their head in agreement but did not speak (_the Chief had told them not to_).

Jack looked at Johnny. He was of Percival's stature but well built for a boy of his height. Jack felt his lust for blood boiling in his veins as he watched the littlun stare back at him, trying to prove his strength to a boy that didn't care.

"Roger," Jack started, smiling, "I think you know the punishment for those who disobey their chief." He turned to the dark haired boy, who smiled back at him.

"Yes, Chief." Roger turned and disappeared behind the rocks as whispering broke out among the boys.

_"Does that mean..."_

_"Yes!"_

_"He's going to be whipped!"_

_"Whipped?"_

_"Like I was!"_

_"Are you sure?"_

_"Of course! That's Merridew's punishment!"_

_"Is Johnny gonna make it?"_

_"Depends who whips him."_

_"What if it's Roger?"_

_"Johnny's dead!"_

Jack waited as Roger appeared next to him, twisting their substitute for a whip around in his hands.

"Hold him."

Samneric grabbed Johnny's arms and legs, stretching him so that he was suspended in mid air with his already bare back facing the sky.

"How many?" Roger whispered, his eyes starting to glow like Jack's at the prospect of blood and torture, of screaming and pain.

"Ten or twenty. However many he can take."

Jack watched for only a moment as screaming erupted around them, as Johnny began crying and begging for mercy. The whip cracked against his flesh and Jack's eyes followed the blood that was trickling down the rocks and staining the sand.

Even when he left the group, stumbled into the jungle and fell onto the dirt covered floor, Jack couldn't block the image from his eyes. What had happened to him? Ralph would never had done that, even when he was chief. Ralph's only punishment was yelling at them for a few minutes, something that had always made the others call Ralph weak. But Jack was different, he'd always been different. Since the beginning he'd tried to replace his desire for Ralph with a desire for blood and it had taken over him completely. He didn't even know the littlun and he had ordered him to be tortured, had again succumbed to the want for the adrenaline rush he always felt at the prospect of blood. Even though he'd proved to the rest of his tribe his strength, he'd always told himself that part of him was still the boy he had been before the island. If he ever got the opportunity to talk to Ralph again, he promised that he'd show him that he wasn't as sadistic as he'd made himself out to be, but that he was...different. Jack only wished that he could sleep so that his mind could get anything to make sense.

Maybe a savage was what he had really become.

Jack's thinking was interrupted as the screaming stopped echoing around him - Johnny had only made it to twelve.

----------

Ralph ran his fingers through his hair; the water slicked it back and pressed it to his skull. The sun had retreated and he was left soaking wet. He sighed; he didn't know what to do, or where he should be so that he could run into Jack for the third night in a row.

Although he would never admit it to the red head if he asked, Ralph had been waiting all day to see him, had spent his entire day thinking about him.

Ralph walked across the sand, back to the old shelters. He was wondering if he should sleep inside, maybe it was finally safe (_but maybe it wasn't)_.

He continued past them - memories were flashing through his mind and he didn't want them to - and across the platform to where the lagoon was. Even if he hadn't eaten, at least he could drink. He felt around for a tree or anything to hold on to. The platform was surrounded by fallen trees that created a canopy and blocked out most of the moonlight.

"This is it, right? We used to have assemblies here, didn't we..." Ralph jumped at the voice, hitting into something he quickly figured out was the trunk of a tree. He looked to his left, to where he had heard the voice speaking in the darkness, but he still couldn't see anything.

"Yes, it was. I remember. You would be standing up here, holding that blasted conch. And Piggy'd be somewhere around here too, and Simon. We fought here. On the day that I left. Somewhere around here, maybe where I'm sitting."

"Jack?" Ralph asked. He was starting to get annoyed by the red head's ability to appear out of nowhere. "Is that you?"

"Of course it's me. If it was anyone else, you'd already be dead."

"But I can't see you. How do I know none of your other tribe members are here?"

"You don't." There was silence, and Ralph could picture the way Jack was smiling as he heard the other start laughing. "You're never going to trust me, are you?"

"Of course not! I can't even see you, how do I know that Roger and Bill aren't sitting right next to you?"

"I can't see you either, Ralph. But I imagine you must look pathetic."

"What are you even doing here? I thought you would have forgotten all of this by now." There was silence, and Ralph took the opportunity to lower himself so that he was sitting on the ground. He didn't trust Jack and he knew that he couldn't, but he thought if there were any more people there, they would have done something already.

"I thought I had. But we had an assembly today."

Ralph burst out laughing. "An assembly? Jack Merridew ordered an assembly? You have no rules. What need to do you have for an assembly?"

"We do have rules. And a littlun broke one."

"Did you roast him over a fire like one of your pigs?"

"No. He was whipped."

"You whipped a littlun? Which one?"

"I don't know their names. It was one of the smaller ones."

"How could you whip a littlun? What the bloody hell did he do?" Ralph was shocked. After their recent encounters, he had grown to think that maybe there was kindness left in Jack. But torturing a child only emphasized the red head's desire for blood he'd become so familiar with.

"He disobeyed his chief, and that merits punishment."

"What are you, Jack?" Ralph was ready for the silence. It was deafening and surrounded him until he felt like he would scream if no one said anything.

"Tell me. Are you one of your empty, mindless hunters that kills and feasts and dances and hides behind some stupid clay mask or are you the person I talked to last night, the one that brought me food and told me I was beautiful and kissed me?"

Even though he couldn't see him, Jack knew that Ralph was getting angry. He could hear it in the way his voice was starting to shake, in the way that his voice was echoing around them and ripping through the silence.

"I'm both."

"You can't be both."

"I'm insane, Ralph. I can be both. And I am."

"What do you mean?"

"Ralph, this island has completely driven me crazy. It's driven all of us past the breaking point. Even if you're not part of my tribe, you're just as insane as the littluns cowering behind rocks over some stupid, make believe beast. I've wanted to kiss you since we got on this bloody island, but I wanted you to like me first. And I thought if I was the leader, if I could show you my strength by killing a pig and bringing back food for everyone, you would at least think higher of me. But all you did was yell because I was taking your power, because I wasn't helping you. So I covered my lust for you with a want for blood and control because it became pretty obvious that you would rather spend your time with Simon and Piggy than with me. I didn't expect any of this to happen. But if I can't have you then I want to be chief and to feel blood dripping through my fingers..."

"Is that why you killed Simon and Piggy? Because you were jealous?"

"Their deaths were accidents, Ralph..."

"Piggy's death wasn't an accident! Roger pushed a boulder off Castle Rock so that it would hit him!"

"That's not my fault, I never told them to kill Piggy."

"You didn't?"

"No, I only told them to kill you."

"What?" Ralph practically screamed as his voice echoed around them. "If you wanted me so badly then why'd you tell them to kill me?"

"Because you didn't like me, Ralph! And it hurt! And if I wanted to feel anyone's blood, I wanted it to be yours! You're prey and I'm a hunter. I want your blood on my hands. Damnit, Ralph, I haven't stopped thinking about you since we got on this island and you've been too obsessed with your bloody rules to even realize it. And obviously nothing's changed with all the screaming you've been doing."

Ralph closed his eyes and dropped his face into his palms. He knew he didn't want to say it, but he knew that he had to (_because so much of him wanted to)._

"How do you know that nothing's changed?" Ralph spoke into hands.

"What?" Jack asked. Ralph was practically whispering, and the red head inched closer to him.

Ralph sighed and looked at the darkness in front of him, at where he thought Jack was sitting. He cursed inside his head.

"How do you know that nothing's changed?"

Jack stopped what he guessed was only a few feet away from Ralph. His mouth dropped open in shock and he didn't know what to say, he couldn't even begin to comprehend what Ralph was saying.

"Wait," Jack started, completely lost and feeling slightly dazed. "I kiss you once and suddenly...you don't hate me anymore?"

Ralph was surprised at how close Jack sounded, but he disregarded it. "I told you last night I don't hate you."

"What would you do if I kissed you again?" The red head continued inching forward, but he knew that Ralph wasn't going to answer his question. He reached out, not knowing if he was close enough to touch the other yet.

Ralph dropped his head and was shocked when he felt Jack's warm hand on the side of his neck. He trailed his fingers down his shoulder and back up to the side of Ralph's face.

"Say something," Jack whispered. He could feel his heart start pounding as he waited for Ralph to answer so that he would know exactly where his mouth was.

"Kiss me," Ralph replied. It was barely a moment before Jack's mouth captured his. He was somehow higher than him and Ralph arched his back, slipping his arms around Jack's neck to bring themselves closer. The red head fell as Ralph pulled him down and he collapsed out top of the other, their lips breaking contact.

"Ow!" Ralph winced as Jack's elbow collided with his ribs. Jack rolled off of him and started laughing.

"That was awful," Jack said in a way that Ralph could hear the smirk on his face.

"Shut up! I didn't know you were kneeling! I can barely even see you." Ralph attempted to defend himself, but he knew that it was his fault the kiss had ended.

"I was only talking about the ending. I enjoyed the rest of it, as short as it..." Ralph blushed and was thankful that there wasn't enough light for Jack to see that he was.

Jack ran his fingers along the ground until he finally found Ralph's hand. He pulled the fair haired boy closer to him again _(because this time he was going to make sure they got it right)._

Jack found Ralph's mouth again. They were level this time and the red head rested his hand on the other's shoulder. Ralph's hair was so soft as he felt it between his fingers. The fair haired boy leaned closer, running his hand up the front of Jack's bruised and starved torso. Never, in his entire time on the island, had he imagined that he would be touching Jack Merridew like this. Ralph encircled his arms around Jack's neck and pulled the red head against him so that their bodies were touching, and the heat was evaporating into the cool, jungle air.

Even when their lips separated, they never stayed apart for long. And each new kiss was filled with the remembrance of heated arguments and feelings of hatred that had first ripped apart their friendship. Jack couldn't get enough of Ralph, and with each touch he wanted more (_needed more). _

Jack could feel himself falling to pieces as Ralph engulfed him, surrounded him. Ralph tasted so smooth, softer than velvet, and Jack wanted to feel all of him. He moved his lips down Ralph's neck, kissing, biting, teasing as the fair haired boy arched his back underneath him. Ralph could feel his nails tearing into Jack's shoulders. Jack lightly placed his hand on the inside of Ralph's thigh and he felt the fair haired boy's body twitch. He moved to whisper in his ear.

"You're shaking." Jack placed a kiss on Ralph's ear and bite down on his lobe.

"Shut up! It's your fault..." Ralph could barely speak, he felt so hot, like everything around him was spinning.

Jack smirked as he rested against the side of Ralph's neck, running his fingers up and down the front of his chest. Ralph turned his cheek and buried it in the top of Jack's red hair.

Despite that he was touching him, lying next to him, feeling his tanned skin beneath his own fingers, Jack couldn't comprehend that any of this was real. How many months had he spent wanting this that it had finally happened?

Jack pinned Ralph to the dirt and kissed him again. But even as he pushed the kiss deeper, even though he could taste him, even though he could feel Ralph's fingers resting on the small of his back and pulling them closer together, none of it was close enough for Jack. He wanted Ralph to be everywhere, to fully surround him in a way that no one had before, and even as Jack's lust was exploding inside of him, thoughts he'd been trying to block out started blaring inside his head. He knew he had to get back to camp, even though it would be hours until daylight woke the rest of his tribe. He couldn't chance if some one would come looking for him, and what would happen if they found him with Ralph the way they were now.

Jack pulled away so suddenly and so quickly that Ralph's jaw almost dropped open.

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately as Jack removed his hands from his waist.

"I have to get back to Castle Rock," he replied. Ralph could hear that it sounded urgent, but it didn't change his shock.

"Why? I don't want you to leave." Jack tried to ignore the thrill that comment created inside him as he cursed his entire tribe for ruining everything for him.

"I can't stay. They might come looking for me. I can't chance them finding you..." Jack trailed off and hoped that Ralph would follow him, because his life might depend on it.

"I understand." Jack heard the disappointment in Ralph's voice but tried his best to ignore it - or at least the effect it had on him. There was silence in which they both waited; neither of them knew how to say good bye.

"I'll see you," Jack said as he leaned in to kiss Ralph one last time on the forehead.

Before Ralph could say anything in return, he heard the rustle of leaves next to him and knew he was alone again.

-

-

**A.N.: Oh my gosh, I owe you my deepest apologies. I had no idea that it's been so long since my last update. I'm on break now, and the week before is always the longest, and I just had no idea. It completely slipped my mind.**

**I hope the making out made up for it. =]**

**And, for the first time, individual thank you's! Because I have the time.**

**Tobi-Uchiha – Oh wow, that was some review. It made my day more than you can imagine. I like Jack being sort of a creep, because being on the island this long he's probably starting to go insane. Just thank you, thank you so much. I always love and anticipate your reviews, they mean a lot. ::hugs::**

**XbuttonsX – My school was closed that day too! It was wonderful to wake up to your review. Thank you so much, I'm so glad you liked it. Again, I always love your reviews! ::hugs::**

**Crock-fever – Thank you so much! Really, it means a lot to me. Your review was so sweet! ::hugs::**

**ferretstheslave – Aw, your review made me smile and start clapping! Thank you! ::hugs::**

**Uncertain – Aw, thank you so much! ::hugs::**

**Mystery Amigo – Oh my gosh, what a sweet review! You have no idea how much it made me smile. I promise, I won't let an update go that long. Thanks again! ::hugs::**

**And to my new favorites (Tobi-Uchiha and Poison x Rainbow) and to my new alerts (Ichigo –dattebayo, Uncertain, and mewstarlight), tons of thank you's and hugs. It means a lot. **

**Really, I hope you all enjoyed it and thank you for your continued support! **

**Please Review! Love and hugs if you do!**


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